Saturday, June 05, 2004

Ramblings

While our school is to open a week later than most schools in the country, (June 7) I can feel the tension building up within my system now. More and more questions are racking my brain more than ever before. I never had this feeling for almost eighteen years. I remember feeling tense twenty years ago when I was a neophyte in teaching. Having graduated from a course totally different from my targeted profession took its toll and I was breathless, my heart palpitating fast, my knees weak especially when I first saw the first class of Grade 7 pupils coming to my room.

I didn't know what to expect then. What will the students say about me? I was paranoid. A simple smile meant a sneer, I was being laughed at, etc. This is what I am feeling today as opening day draws nearer. What will the students think about me in my new post? More importantly, how will the teachers, students and parents take my decisions. Surely, I will be stepping on someone's toes someday. How will I turn each situation that come my way into a win/win scenario?

A large part of the problem is that I can't consider myself as a very disciplined man. I have a tendency to overindulge. A classic example is food. I have a very big appetite. I occasionally cook when my wife couldn't for some reason or another. Now, there has been a saying that a cook finds it hard to eat lots of his/her own cooking. I don't know who came up with that saying but it doesn't work for me. Now, for someone who is diabetic, that spells trouble. Thanks to glucophageI manage to have my blood sugar under control. Another example is smoking. While I have cut down on my consumption, I still couldn't kick the habit. These are the issues I have to contend with personally before I can be confident with my new assignment. If I am sure that I am a man of discipline, then I can look anybody in the eye and say, yes, that was my decision and it's anchored on my own principles.

Oh well, all I can do is look back to when I started and be contented that I have managed to stay this long. If I have done it before, there is no reason why I couldn't do it now even if the consequences have changed. Amen!

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

i think you will do well, taken into consideration your experience. you may not be a disciplined man yourself but the best disciplinarians are those that have been non-conformists

rolly said...

Hi,

Thanks for reading and the vote of confidence. Care to identify yourself?

bayibhyap said...

I think you've done great. Take a small step at a time and you will achieve your goal in no time! Dr Emer has some good ideas. He told me to take six small meals a day instead of three larger ones. His advice makes sense.

bayibhyap said...

Sorry, rolly. I meant to ask but I forget. Are you a teacher or are you a school principal?

rolly said...

hi bayi,

as a diabetic, I have been adviced by my doctor about my meals and yes, Doc Emer's suggestion is one of them. The thing is I just can't resist eating a large meal. Although I don't take more than three meals a day. I am planning to cut down asap, though.

No, i'm not the principal. far from it. The principal's a good friend, if that counts. hahaha. Anyway, he just appointed me as level coordinator. As such, it means I will be handling all discipline cases of students and managing teacher's classroom management styles. This is not my first admi position. I was Art coordinator for seven years till I resigned and got back to teaching for about five odd years. Sayang. i was enjoying my stint as a class adviser, especially with the seniors.

How about you? I was trying to catch a glimpse of your blog but the site doesn't seem to have an entry yet. I'll go look again. Thanks for coming back.

bayibhyap said...

I don't have a blog yet. I am still new to blogging and I have yet to discipline myself to learn how to start a blog. But I do enjoy reading your entries and will be back regularly.

bayibhyap said...

Incidentally, I'm not a diabetic. But Dr Emer was just worried that I may go on a drastic diet and hence, his advice. I wish my personal doctor could be as caring as him! Well, take care because diabetes often complicates other health conditions. I am hypertensive and like you, I am on drugs to mitigate my condition.