April 20 is a very important date for me. Not only is this the day my wife was born, it is also the day we got married. Today, we celebrate our 25th year of being together, our silver anniversary.
A silver lining is a hopeful or comforting prospect in the midst of difficulty. What it means is that in spite of the most difficult situations, there is something beautiful that is hidden beneath the rabbles. The beauty of the desert is that somewhere, it hides a well... (from the Little Prince
When I got married after a two-year engagement with my wife, I knew that there would be problems that we have to hurdle as husband and wife. Who does not? But we managed to overcome them. Now, it's twenty five years hence and our relationship is still going strong, thanks to our four children who are barely children anymore, and our enduring love for each other. Now that is the silver lining to our marriage. Problems sure came along the way but we braved the storms together. As a matter of fact, it was almost smooth sailing most of the way from day 1.
My wife and I make a pretty good team. As soon as we knew we were sure to be hitched for life, we started by saving money for our wedding. We opened a joint bank account specifically to spend for it lest we bother other family members about our own private lives. From that time on,after marriage, we embarked on different major projects every year. First was the house where we now live in, then, the car, etc... Last year, we had the house renovated and added more rooms and an upstairs CR. Fortunately, the house was completed before Ondoy. We practically started from scratch and what we have today is the result of our combined perspiration and blood.
Of course, the kids were always a part of the equation. When these guys were still toddlers, we would rent a private pool in Laguna and together with family and friends, celebrate our wedding anniversary there. This was the time when the kids were just learning to swim. Later, when they were about to be teen-agers, our "outings" began to be in farther destinations with a set of friends who were with us since our early years in the university where we both work(ed) (My wife still works there). We have traveled as far north as Pagudpud and way down south to Bicol, Marinduque and Mindoro. These are friends who are considered part of the family. Our children grew up together, slept in one room and spent most of the nights playing games. These escapades were pleasurable silver linings that helped us to be what we are now as a couple.
I must admit, the best silver lining in our marriage is my wife's admirable virtues of tolerance, understanding and piety. There is no other woman who can put up with my mood swings, my temper (I'm not really that bad but I do have these sometimes) and undying support for me. As an artist and a teacher, which unfortunately, do not bring tons of money in the household, she managed to keep me in tow, helped me through hard times, even managed to get me back to school a couple of times to take my masters and another course. But as I am, I always fall short even when I can almost see the finishing line. I know this was upsetting for her but really, I could not finish something I do not find enjoying anymore. That's me. It's all fun and excitement but as intolerable of sadness and sacrifices. We only live once and I want to make the best out of it.
Last night, I have decided that the children are old enough to spread their wings on their own. I have instructed my children to come home early and look after their grandmother as I was taking their mom on a date. Yes, just the two of us. We have not done this in a long time. Everything we did was for the children. It is high time that we do things for ourselves, enjoy each other's company and see the stars, smell the flowers the way they are without any worries at all. I took her to an Italian restaurant in Serendra called Balducci Ristorante to have a quiet dinner. The food was uber delicious! As I am wont to stare at other people, I made sure I did not face anybody but the bar and made sure I did not bring any cigs in my pocket. How's that for discipline, huh? All for the love of my life. For starters, we had a greek salad. Then, I ordered for onion soup which was spectacular! For our main course, we ordered pasta, as usual It was divine!
After, dinner, we took a stroll of Bonifacio High Street, looking at the stores. I asked her if she wanted to go to a spa but she declined. She was good! All these while the children entertained their cousins and titos and titas to a dinner at the house.
As cliche as it may sound, if I were to be given another chance in life, I will seek my wife again and marry her the second, the third time. For it is only she who can make me who I am and see a silver lining in the thickest of clouds.
Labels: birthdays, family, marriage