Let's talk about relationships
Now that I am in my middle years (I believe I will reach the ripe old age of 80), I think I can talk about friendship and relationship like a pro. Of course, I've "been there, done that" during my years here on earth. Believe me when I say that you cannot live a happy life without friends. These are the people who you can count on when you need companionship. The people you can turn to when you are lonely, the people who will help you when you are in trouble and in need. They are more like brothers and sisters to you.
How does one make friends? I think this was addressed by the fox in the Little Prince. He told the prince how to befriend someone. He told him to meet him every three o'clock without fail and soon enough, the fox would miss him once he fails to show up.
During my growing up years, I have had more female friends who were really close to me than I had male friends. Of course, neither am I gay, nor were they love interests of mine. They were all platonic. I knew back then if the woman would be a friend or a girlfriend. I don't think there was a time when I have interchanged the two.
The reason for this is because I enjoy the company of women more than I enjoy the company of men. When I am with men, there is this competitive thing I have to overcome. And almost always, I end up in trouble. Play rough games, win! Basketball? My team had to win! Swimming, I have to swim faster! Drink alcohol? I have to make sure to see them all on the ground bathe in their own retch. (Well, that can be an exaggeration but I never went home more drunk than the next guy. I know how to carry my booze) Lastly, there had been a number of occasions when I got into a brawl with my male friends. I can't forget that time when I celebrated my 16th birthday in San Miguel, Bulacan when me and my friends got into a fight with unknown older guys who were as drunk as we were on the street. My guitar which was given to me by my brother, who bought it in Spain, landed on somebody's head. Or was it at another time? I was drunk, remember? All I remember was that I woke up with a very heavy headache than was normal when nursing a hangover and when I looked at my face in the mirror, my head was swollen. I learned later that they took me to the hospital as I was unconscious for a long time. This is the reason why I drink very seldomly and only with people I am comfortable with.
Anyway, the reasons why I'd rather go out on gimmicks with women are: they smell nicer, more pleasant to look at and the conversation has always been interesting. In short, it is easier for me to feel at ease with women than with men. Maybe that is because I have more sisters and only one brother. Besides, I practically grew up alone. Being the youngest of five siblings, I was born when my youngest sister was already 13 years old. I have always longed for a younger sister.
I feel lonely right now that most of my friends in school, the friends with whom I have shared my joy and my angst with work have either gone abroad or has resigned. My bestfriend in college had died of cancer, and one of my closest friends is fighting for her life with the same disease. Worse, not only are the new batch of teachers coming in are much younger than I am, they see me as an administrator rather than as a friend. Now I know that the saying "it is lonely at the top" is true. And I am not even at the top! At best, my position is what we call "primus inter pares" or first among equals. Mot really top of the line, is it? Nothing to brag about. At any rate, I have this feeling that I am intruding everytime I try to join them during their light moments. I try reaching out but sometimes I feel estranged.
This is the reason why I value my blogging friends. They are always there no matter what time of day and that is not an exaggeration. Wake up in the wee hours of the morning and there will be someone online. We all come from different parts of the globe, you see. All i have to do is turn on the computer, go to my gmail account and somebody is sure to be there. I am talking about my friends in Blogkadahan. We are celebrating our first year anniversary this month and to celebrate it, we decided we would talk about poverty. Check it out! The posts are very interesting. If you care to look at mine, here check this out.