Friday, September 10, 2004

Enjoy her while you can

I have not been very active lately. I have a lot of backlogs in work and in blogging. I have a very good excuse. Last Sunday, I went to visit my 85 year old mother only to find her weak and not her old self. I tried talking to her but she would only nod and kept on sleeping. i thought she only wanted to rest and so I left.

As you may know by now, I celebrated my birthday last Tuesday. Birthdays are supposed to be happy occasions but on this one, I had the greatest scare of my life. I thought I was going to lose my mother. It turned out that she had not been responding to my brother and sister when talked to and wouldn't wake up. They called for an ambulance and took her to MCM where it was found out that she was suffering from bed sores. Apparently, my siblings did not know how to move her while in bed. Dr. Redentor Pagtalunan, our surgeon for so many years, God bless him, attended to her. He took charge and ordered for some sort of an operation to take out a lump from my mother's back. This created a big hole. I didn't know this could happen. Anyway, the doctors even asked us that should my mother have a cardiac arrest, would we allow them to resuscitate. A very painful decision was on our hands. After some careful deliberations, it was agreed that none of us wants to see my mother in that sorry state and so, we said, let's leave it to God. But in the meantime that she's still alive, we want them to do all the best that they can do.

Hallelujah! My mother is now awake and even giving us a hard time because she would keep on taking her IV off her hand, touch the tube on her nose that we had to tie her when we have to fall asleep so as to restrain her from causing her more damage. Her vital signs are okay which I believe means she will still have a long way to go. Boy am I relieved!!!

So, to all of you who still have your mother around, enjoy their company for we do not know what the future has for all of us. I did not go to school today to be with my mom. Funny, but when the doctor asked her if her condition was "gumaganda o pumapangit" She smilingly said, "pumapangit" then laughed. Yup folks! That's my mom. She may have forgotten who I am or who the people in her room are but she never lost her composure and her sense of humor.


In a different story, I was watching Dateline news (I don't know if that was current or a replay) the other day, and I found out that Americans go to Canada to purchase medicines because it's a lot cheaper there. However, this austerity measure will soon be gone for guess what? American drug companies like Pfizer, etc. have forbidden Canadian drug stores from selling drugs to Americans or face repercussions. hmmm, and I thought America is land of the free. Well, it's true that they have not prevented Americans from buying elsewhere but they have restrained the sources from selling them. So what's the difference? And all for the sake of profit. Shame! Shame!!


BatJay said...

hehe... ang galing naman ng mommy mo. nagpapatawa pa kahit naghihirap sa hospital. yan ang mga idol ko - may sense of humor in spite of.

i hope she gets better. i know how hard it must be for you. take it easy. there's nothing more you can do except to continue to be a good son.

BongK said...

now i know why ur not that active in blog lately, and it surely is a very good excuse. I pray that ur mom will get "PRETTY" well :-)

btw, si Nanay ko ay nakapisan ngayon sa house ng sister ko, sa Pasig din... Ka Rolly thank you for continuously inspiring me..

Dr. Emer said...

Yep. Hug her more. Be with her more. Kung puede, ipasyal mo sya. mahirap yung tigil ng tigil sa bahay. lalo syang made-depress, Tito Rolly.

Yung bedsores kalabang mortal ng mga matatanda at me diabetes, Tito Rolly. Simple problem pero grave ang consequences pag di mo na-prevent. Source ng infection yan. Dapat me turuan kang 24-hour na taga-bantay nya.

Make these times count, Tito Rolly. I have been there, too, and believe me, my heart grieves until this day. My friends say I've done more than any other son could have done in the same situation, but with the love I got from my Mama, I still feel I have been found lacking and remiss.

Take good care of her.

Anonymous said...

I'm glad to hear your mother is doing better. There's nothing worse than losing someone very dear to you.

I'll say a prayer for her and for the rest of your family for strength.

God Bless you guys!

cathcath said...

you made me cry again. my mom also laughed while i was helping the nurses pull her up the bed in order to change her. I teased her that she had to diet because she was giving me a hard time. In truth, she was so skinny that you would think she would slip from your grips.I saw the bed sores too and I was sorry for her . I was mad with my sister-nurse who was responsible for her care.

She motioned to me to remove the tubes. She would like to go but my sisters would not allow it. She was still young but cancer took her.

that scene in the hospital was the moment, i could not forget. i am doing the family album and yet i could not
finish it without shedding tears everytime i retrieve her pics from my picture album.

Dr. Emer said...

I can relate to what you're relating here, Cath. Ako din di ko pa din matapos maayos gamit ng Mama ko hanggang ngayon. Hindi dahil sa luha kungdi dahil sa sobrang lungkot kapag hinahawakan ko mga gamit nya. I still have a problem with crying. Still no tears til this time.

Tama si Tito Rolly. As sons and daughters, fortunate are those who still have their Mamas with them in their midst. They should do something with their blessing before God takes it away from them.

ting-aling said...

Ay yay yay. Talking about mothers. My mother had a heart attack when I passed my board exams, she expired on my oathtaking. Bitter-sweet memories.

I took her to the operating table. She asked for a goodbye kiss but I did not give her believing she was coming back. She died on that day.

These are memories I hate to remember but I have to to make me a better mom to my kids. You guys who still have mothers are lucky. Enjoy your moms. Treat them like it was going to be their last day every day. You'll never know.

Mik said...

hi, tito rolly... i can totally relate about how you feel about your mom, because we experienced that with my lola a few years ago. my sister and i still cry when we talk about her.
i hope your mom gets a lot better soon; she sounds like a wonderful person, pretty much like my own lola. :)

Mik said...

hi, tito rolly... i can totally relate about how you feel about your mom, because we experienced that with my lola a few years ago. my sister and i still cry when we talk about her.
i hope your mom gets a lot better soon; she sounds like a wonderful person, pretty much like my own lola. :)

rolly said...

Sorry guys for a generic reply this time. Thank you all for the show of concern. My mother is getting better. ANG KULIT!!!! Yesterday, she cried for no apparent reason. When I and m sister asked what was happening, she replied, " kasi ang papangit nyo!" then made a hearty laugh. So you see, I think she'll be okay.

iskolar111 said...

Buying cheaper pharmaceutical drugs from Canada is the best alternative to the high cost of drugs here in the U.S. One of my son's medication is costing me $63 a month. If I don't have health insurance, it's 3 times the cost.
That's why people should vote for John Kerry because he will allow the importation of prescription drugs from Canada.

ajay said...

Uy tito rolly, happy birthday...i didn't know...belated po.
The piece about your mother is's true that you never appreciate one thing until it's gone and so we must all love our mothers while they're alive even though am not close to my mother:( she's 70 and thankfully still strong and healthy....hope your mother gets well soon and when you're not busy, maybe we can talk about the poetry reading event. we need the beauty of poetry in these hard times

santi said...

Tito Rolly,
Good to hear your mother is now better. Sana nga makapiling nyo pa siya ng mas matagal at ma-enjoy niya/ninyo ang mga nalalabi pang mga araw. Nakaka touch din talaga ng puso kapag ang mga matatanda ay marunong pang magpatawa.

Sa kaso ko naman iba, lumaki kami na laging nasa trabaho ang aming mga magulang at pagdating sa gabi matutulog na lang at weekend na lang kami sama-sama. Nandito na ko sa Saudi ng magretiro sila at nagkaroon na rin ako ng sarili kong pamilya. Nakakamiss nga rin kaya sinusulit ko rin pagdating ng bakasyon. Si nanay sakitin na rin at marami na ring iniinom na gamot pero si erpat ok pa naman puwede ko pang makainuman. Buhay pa rin ang nag-iisa na, na paborito kong lola.

Rache said...

tito rolly, you know all too well how i feel about showing relatives how much you love them and cherishing each and every moment with that eulogy i wrote over the recent death of my lolo.

i'm really happy your mom is ok. show her you love her talaga every chance you get. :)

bayibhyap said...

My father was a nuisance after he suffered a stroke and he was really insufferable. He would listen only to me but I worked outstation, nearly two hundred kilometers away and could not spare the time to see him as often. Thank God, his last days were under my care. We really miss him, even today, about 13 years after his demise. Visit her more often, rolly. She just wants to see her children and listen to their voices. Dr Emer's advise is best. Hug her. The love is transmitted beyond words and does wonders. And such actions are also very cathartic to us.

The freedom of America is not as perfect as it seems but it is a much more mature model compared to ours. Cartels have abused the freedom (what else is new in commerce and business?) and wield strong influence over the government. I believe the book industry as with many others also suffer the same fate.

Anonymous said...

First of all, belated happy birthday, Tito Rolly!

Hope your Mom gets better soon. Here's a hug for your Mom and yourself. *hugs*

Ingat po and regards.


Jules said...

dr. emer's right. bed sores are a bane to the elderly, a constant flashpoint. but im happy that you have a 2nd chance to enjoy the company of your mom. carpe diem!

my dad passed away din due to CA and he said he'll be at my graduation but it wasn't meant to be. im glad his death was not sudden that he was able to say goodbye to everyone. but until now, it bleeds my heart to realize that with all his imperfections and flaws, he was the best dad and role model i have and that he's gone forever.

rolly said...

Iskolar yun nga e. What the US is doing is depriving the Americans access to cheaper medicines. I find this weird. Saan na ang fair competition and freedom dun, di ba?

Ajay thanks. Hope you can be closer to your mother now that she's ageing, too. Which poetry reading are you talking about? Do you know of any? I'd love to attend one ad listen.

Santi Halos pareho lang tayo. I only get to see my mom on Sundays when I visit her in her house. Busy rin ako sa trabaho and I have my own family to take care of.

Rache I'm trying my best to do just that. Thanks.

Bayi, I'm trying to do my best to keep my mom company. Hopefully, she'll stay longer as her BP is very normal. yes, I guess books, too, is experiencing something like that from business cartels. So does DVD's, etc...

Belle Thank you! Arlene is very much impressed with your works and said you are so nice to work with. I'm glad.

Julsitos I'm sorry to hear about your dad. What I know is that even if he wasn't there to see you graduate physically, he is still proud of your accomplishments whereever he is.

Sorry guys if I have not been very active lately. i'll try to catch up as soon as work and family matters are settled. Thanks.